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There are certain things you just don’t think you̵7;ll live to say, like, “Another tour de force fro Charlie Sheen” or “A vocal performance oftunning technical brilliance and subtle power y Britney Spears”.  Well, 2008 has been a pretty weird year in many respects,ut I just didn’t think I’d ever see the dayahere I said, “Kathleen Parker makes another good point in her column todayÝ, but whaddya know?

There she goes again:

As Republicans sort out the reasons for their defeat, they likely will overlook or dismis the gorilla in the pulpit.

Three little letters, great big problem: G-O-D.

I’m bathing in holy water as I type.

To be more specific, the evangelical, right-wing, oogedy-boogedy branch of the GOP is what ails the erstwhile conservative party and will continue to afflict and marginalize its constituents if reckoning doesn’t soon cometh.

Simply put: Armband religion is killing the Republican Party.

*spit-take*

WTF?  Is someone spiking her bottles of Bombay Sapphire with sodium pentathol?  Unlike Peggy Noonan, who had occasional moments of lucidity during the Democratic primaries, but then disappeared back into her foggy netherworld of Reagan-worship and Xanax spritzers, Parker seems to have read the writing on the GOP’s wall and taken its meaning to heart.  And she’s kind of funny in the process.  It’s downright disconcerting.

So it has been for the Grand Old Party since the 1980s or so, as it has become increasingly beholden to an element that used to be relegated to wooden crates on street corners.

Uh huh.  They even made one of those street-corner shouters into their VP nominee.

Suffice it to say, the Republican Party is largely comprised of white, married Christians. Anyone watching the two conventions last summer can’t have missed the stark differences: One party was brimming with energy, youth and diversity; the other felt like an annual Depends sales meeting.

With the exception of Miss Alaska, of course.

Even Sarah Palin has blamed Bush policies for the GOP loss. She’s not entirely wrong, but she’s also part of the problem. Her recent conjecture about whether to run for president in 2012 (does anyone really doubt she will?) speaks for itself:

“I’m like, okay, God, if there is an open door for me somewhere, this is what I always pray, I’m like, don’t let me miss the open door. Show me where the open door is…. And if there is an open door in (20)12 or four years later, and if it’s something that is going to be good for my family, for my state, for my nation, an opportunity for me, then I’ll plow through that door.”

Let’s do pray that God shows Alaska’s governor the door.

Kathleen, cut it out, darlin’.  You’re fucking with my head.  You’re writing like a…a…liberal blogger.

Jonah “Jellyroll” Goldberg agrees.

Quit It Kathleen [Jonah Goldberg]

To my friend Kathleen Parker — This act is getting really old…I don’t know what’s more grating, the quasi-bigotry that has you calling religious Christians low brows, gorillas and oogedy-boogedy types or the bravery-on-the-cheap as you salute — in that winsome way — your own courage for saying what (according to you) needs to be said. Please stop bragging about how courageous you are for weathering a storm of nasty email you invite on yourself by dancing to a liberal tune. You aren’t special for getting nasty email, from the right or the left. You aren’t a martyr smoking your last cigarette. You’re just another columnist, talented and charming to be sure, but just another columnist. You are not Joan of the Op-Ed Page. Perhaps the typical Washington Post reader (or editor) doesn’t understand that. But you should, and most conservatives familiar with these issues can see through what you’re doing.